This was my fourth time out on a SUP and by now I realised that maybe I would benefit from actually having some formal tuition. There’s a certain amount of trying things out yourself but to be shown how to do it properly by someone who knows what they’re doing is invaluable. So I booked an introductory session. I was still at Wimbleball but the wind had dropped and all the activities were on again.
I’d hoped to learn how to stand up on my so-called stand-up paddleboard but again, it was not to be. For one thing, the rest of the group were much younger and keen surfers and they just stood up on their boards as naturally as they stand up on land. Fine. I’ll just stay down. It’s less wobbly anyway. On the other hand, I was the only one of the group who’d ever paddled before so once we launched, I had a bit of a head start on the rest of the group. They had no idea about getting the boards to move and turning was a complete mystery.
Our instructor started off with basic paddling skills and then moved on to paddling forwards more efficiently, ie how to paddle in a straight line without swinging the paddle from one side to the other. My old nemesis, the j-stroke. Except that it works differently in a canoe from how it works on a SUP. I still haven’t quite figured out how or why but you do the j-stroke at the front of the craft before the forward stroke on a SUP, instead of at the end like in a canoe. I’d failed miserably and several times by now in a canoe and concluded that if I was reasonably happy to splash myself swinging the paddle back and forth, I’d just live with it. On my SUP, it just worked. Within seconds, I was paddling in a straight line with no issues at all. To jump forward in time a little, I was to invest in my own SUP and take it out on rivers in the evening and I still had to switch sides depending on the current and the shape of the river but on the reservoir, aiming for the yellow buoy halfway across, not only could I get there in a straight line with almost zero effort, but I could get up some good speed. That’s part of my problem with the canoe – my attempts at the j-stroke feel like a turn immediately followed by jamming on the brakes on every single stroke.
This is why you should have at least a basic lesson in any new craft – they all work completely differently and sometimes you just need a human to show you how to do a thing rather than rely on reproducing something you’ve seen on YouTube. I’d never have figured out how to get my paddleboard in a straight line on my own but once I’d had that little lesson, I went straight into it.
We raced to the next buoy and then the instructor picked our next point and we headed for that until we reached the other side of the lake, to a slightly shallower point (have I mentioned that this lake was somewhere around 100m deep this week?) where we were going to play some games. The games are designed mostly to increase your confidence on the board and frankly, that’s a losing battle. I’m too old, I have The Fear. It’s the reason a five-year-old can learn to snowboard but I can’t get any further than a gentle shuffle on the heel edge. Not only that, I have a huge aversion to being in cold water, especially when said cold water is that deep. I’ve already done the “I’m trying to learn not to be scared of the water by swimming in it” post but my brain and my instincts were going to go to the ends of the earth to not fall into the reservoir.
The first game didn’t go very well – it was a floating game of Bulldog and none of us knew how to play. Wasn’t that a series of headlines throughout the 90s and 2000s? Bulldog being banned in schools in a slow wave across the country? I’ve never played it – we stuck to classics like It, Stuck in the Mud, the Princess & the Dogs and Peter Pan.
The second game was ok – it was basically a cross between It and a game we used to play at Guides called Empire, with decisions settled by rock-paper-scissors. Being chased meant using our speed and using our turning skills to dodge out of each others’ way. I’ve had some practice and training in turning in both canoes and over-sized sea kayaks so that went ok. Oh, I didn’t win, not by a long way. I got five out of six countries into my empire but then all five of us got taken by Wakanda at the end.
But the third game was making a raft and scampering between them, finishing with everyone getting on the one board, which happened to be mine. We did succeed, albeit with the board floating two inches below the water under the weight of too many passengers. I was about to take a triumphant photo when someone slipped and the whole board turned over sideways. By pure luck – well, iron-clad determination not to go in the water – I managed to cling to its stern and pull the thing round the right way and whoever was on the bow also clung on, which meant I didn’t just slide straight off the end.
By the time we got back to shore, I definitely felt like I’d learned something, even if it wasn’t how to stand up. Now I could hire a SUP whenever I felt like it and I’d know how to use it. Did I know I was a month away from buying my own? Nope.
Bumblebee Paddles 